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You can’t imagine it, Jessie J remarks. At that moment preparing for her first album release in eight years, deeply enamored with her recent boyfriend, and finally the mother of a toddler after struggling to conceive for a decade, feeling invincible. Suddenly in March she was told she had breast cancer.

The singer-songwriter, birth name Jessica Cornish, is known for telling it as it is. The record, Don’t Tease Me With a Good Time, was supposed to be an candid account, tackling every moment of pain she’d experienced since she last worked on songs (a gynecological condition, pregnancy loss, failed relationships, emotional abuse, suicide) with typical candour. The lead track, the song No Secrets, was dropped in April. But by then there was a mighty secret. The cancer. Later second single, Living My Best Life, came out in May and she was giving interviews about how she was enjoying life to the fullest, while at the same time coping with her cancer. A month later she shared the news, and in July she underwent breast removal surgery.

She offers me her best “Are you kidding?” glance. “I release with a song called No Secrets. I’m conducting every interview, and they inquire, ‘Any updates?’ and I answer, ‘Uh, nothing really’” she has just had to call off performances because she’s yet to undergo follow-up surgery.

We’re at a photo studio in London. She is wearing a beige fake-leather jacket, jeans with elaborate white patches, beige footwear and big frames. Imagine biker chic meets vintage look. “It seems like I’m in the 1970s and I should have a man with facial hair.” Easy Rider, I say, thinking of the film. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She beams. Jessie is sharp-witted, bold and direct. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is planning to attempt her first comedy performance soon. “I love making people laugh. When performing I frequently joke about the fans.”

Health Struggles and Diagnosis

Cornish was getting ready for an slot at the ceremony when she noticed an abnormality. “I immediately went to get it looked at, had an ultrasound, and they were, like, ‘It seems benign; you’ve got really good dense breast tissue.’ And I responded, ‘Yet I sense it. My arm hurts and tingling in my hands whenever I get up.’ And they said, ‘We should biopsy it?’ That was 28 March, the day after my birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The physician told her if it was bad news she’d reach out on the Monday. By then the singer had convinced herself it was nothing. The way she explains it, it was just bad timing to receive a diagnosis when she had a busy schedule.

“We’re two weeks away from launching this thing after years away and no new music. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Are you free at six?’ And I assumed, ‘A video call, likely minor.’ So I log in thinking it’s all going to be fine, and she goes, ‘You might want to sit.’ You know that sad tone they use? And she says, ‘I regret to inform you but your biopsy results have indicated high-grade cancer cells.’” What was your reaction? “I answered, ‘Oh, that’s not ideal, is it?. What awful timing.’ My initial thought was, ‘I can’t die because my son needs me.’”

I’ve been labeled difficult for knowing myself

She viewed the procedure scary and bizarre. “I dislike anesthesia. They walk you down. You know when you have emergency surgery you go on a gurney, but now I just strolled down with a hospital gown and my backside out. You feel like you’re in an episode of Black Mirror.” But, she notes, she’s been lucky. No chemotherapy or radiation, just the op. “Cancer is awful, but yet I’m grateful it was caught soon. The surgery happened recently and my affected breast now resembles a grapefruit under a tight bedsheet.” Another grin. “At least the nipple remains.”

The follow-up procedure is for health and appearance. Her chest, she observes, are now “uneven. The size doesn’t match. That’s impolite! I felt, why make it worse, I’m already having a rough time. So rude! It’s funny because I said I’d not undergo augmentation because I’ve got OCD, and I know they’d never be ideal. Cancer ruined that plan.”

Previous Struggles

She is accustomed to medical issues. She believes her outlook on her diagnosis has been so positive because she’s familiar with medical emergencies. Many times they occur alongside professional successes, acting as a reminder, or blow, to remind her not to be complacent. “Honestly, I feel life goes, ‘Enjoying yourself? Hold on.’ From a young age, it has consistently accompanied moments of success for me; a major or strange event has impacted my body.”

She reminisces to her childhood, already making her debut starring in the London theater in Whistle Down the Wind (she was selected at the age of nine). That’s when she was found to have the medical problem Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome, which can cause a fast heartbeat as well as lightheadedness and palpitations. “I was going in and out of rehearsals on an drip, and being readmitted at night.” She fast-forwards six years, and teenage Jess has become part of the girl group Soul Deep while studying at the performing arts school. “I just got my first record deal, and I had a cerebral event. Then when I was about to put out music in recently I had a automobile accident and my voice box shifted and I couldn’t sing for a year.”

Oi, I say, hold on, I need a moment. A stroke so young? She nods|agrees